Within the expanding horizon of computation, the internet, artificial intelligence, social media, etc., much more today is copy of copy of copy than was yesterday. Yet more will be copy tomorrow. It’s copy that’s diluted and plattered in posts and articles, available in the endless buffet of infinite scroll. Consuming human thought this way leaves me feeling over-informed and dissatisfied.
A couple weeks ago I watched a documentary about the philosopher Rene Girard, who started his career as a literary critic. A line from the documentary stuck — Girard’s colleague describing ‘learning to read’ with him, “He certainly taught me many things, especially how to read. He taught me to read with an open mind, and not to read with reverence, not to read with obedience — to read freely even the greatest authors. [That] you can be interested in what the text says, and also what the text does not say, and also what the text wants to hide” (~52m).
I love this notion of free and unabashedly critical reading. Reading paper books slowly enough to develop critical thoughts about them is an antidote to over-information.
I have been guilty in my life of reading with blind acceptance, and therefore, absorbing some ideas and rejecting others without testing them first. In 2024, I opened myself more to chewing on ideas, and as a result it was my best year of reading yet. I was receptive to new genres — particularly, psychology and philosophy. And, it turns out, reading about how humans think and what life means is delightful.
My favorites in the genre of Psychology and Philosophy:
Attached (Amir Levine & Rachel Heller) - Basic introduction to attachment theory. At first I was skeptical of attachment theory, because I read Attached as a diagnosis for relating to others — i.e. people should fit neatly into secure, anxious, avoidant, or disorganized bins. But over conversations with my therapist and a philosophy reading group, I started thinking of attachment as much broader. I now understand it to be the accumulated mosaic of experience, thought, and emotion we hold in relation to objects — ideas, other beings, favorite lamps, etc. — which inform how we interact with those objects and the world more broadly.
Anger (Thich Naht Hahn) - Mindful practices for dealing with an emotion which can be destructive and therefore which I’ve often judged harshly when expressed in myself and others. But anger often means something should be known.
Breath (James Nestor) - I used to laugh at mouth taping, but after I read this, I started taping. I think it’s improved my sleep.
Dopamine Nation (Anna Lembke) - In part, assesses smartphone and media use through the lens of addiction studies. I found the chapter on shame (destructive shame, “…which deepens the emotional experience of shame and sets us up to perpatuate the behavior that led to feeling shame in the first place…” vs. prosocial shame, “…[which] mitigates the emotional experience of shame and helps us stop or reduce the shameful behavior.”) particularly interesting.
It’s Not You (Ramani Durvasula) - This is a primer on narcissistic relationships. It provides a useful framework for identifying and healing from narcissistic abuse and the profoundly confusing shame and grief that comes along with it.
Self Compassion (Kristin Neff) - This book & the associated exercises facilitated a personal revolution in addressing, rather than hiding from shame. The feeling is an onion, but Neff’s book is straightforward. Highly recommended for every person who grew up Catholic or in New England.
Setting Boundaries that Stick (Juliane Taylor Shore) - ‘Setting boundaries’ is a most popular term. Often I hear people misapply ‘setting boundaries’ when they mean ‘making ultimatums.’ This book clarifies that boundaries are largely internal — we choose what we allow into and out of our heads and bodies.
The Anxious Generation (Jonathan Haidt) - Perhaps the best summary of the 'alone together' pressures of smartphone use, social media, gaming, etc. I've ever read. Starts the conversation with somatic realities of modern life — how humans have evolved to be embodied, communicate synchronously, find rhythm together, and how we've developed technologies that disembody us, are totally asynchronous, and destroy natural rhythms — leading to elevating rates of anxiety and depression among young people today. Ends it with practical advice to improve human connection, encourage resilience beginning in childhood, and reclaim attention. A must read!
The Body Keeps the Score (Bessel van der Kolk) - Hugely helpful, nudged me to pursue acupuncture, breathwork, and bodywork as the next phase in recovery after a six-year ordeal that started with a broken femur. Also helped me unearth and process some blocked emotions related to the loss of my best friend Dan in 2021, and grieve more fully the loss of Mike in October.
The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership (Jim Dethmer, Diana Chapman, & Kaley Warner Klemp) - Principles & practices to get 'above the line' - open, curious, & committed to learning, vs. remaining 'below the line' - closed, defensive, & committed to being right.
The Identity Trap (Yascha Mounk) - Why woke won’t work. History of identity politics with powerful arguments on the hazards presented by the ideology. Provides good examples of identity-based policy failures during the COVID era.
The Republic (Plato) - My first tangle with philosophy, read during a 10-week seminar series organized by Niko Kovacevic and led by Paul Diduch, via Parnassus House. I’ll be writing more on ideas from the Republic later, but briefly I’ve noticed two outcomes of this reading style. First, (per ‘chewing on ideas’ in the intro above) I find myself questioning how and why I know what I know. Internally, I treat my judgments and thoughts alike with an internal boundary, ‘why do I feel/think this way?” Second, I find myself deploying Socratic dialogue in conversations — pausing more to ask clarifying questions, follow-up, and check in. I find it leads to much better discussions overall, with a greater chance of my learning something, vs. reinforcing something (I think) I knew.
The Righteous Mind (Jonathan Haidt) - A very good book. Outlines the psychological underpinnings of morality, and how different people may think differently about what’s right and good. Particularly useful to interpret how folks of different political leanings (left vs. right) have separate moral pillars they rely on. “Morality binds and blinds. This is not something that happens to people on the other side. We all get sucked into tribal moral communities. We circle about sacred values and then share post hoc arguments about why we are so right and they are so wrong. We think the other side is blind to truth, reason, science, and common sense, but in fact everyone goes blind when talking about their sacred objects.”
Other Nonfiction:
After Geoengineering (Holly Jean Buck)
And There Was Light (Jon Meacham) - Lincoln’s biography. A benevolent dictator & monumental human.
Cheaper, Faster, Better (Tom Steyer)
Free Range Kids (Lenore Skenazy) - It all boils down to “Don’t try to kidproof your world. Worldproof your kids.”
Getting Things Done (David Allen) - Too long a book for simple principles, but a useful notetaking system to clear the mind. Rather, read the sparknotes version in “The Great CEO Within.”
Hooked (Nir Eyal)
How to Know a Person (David Brooks)
Land (Simon Winchester)
Sapiens (Yuval Noah Harari)
Supercommunicators (Charles Duhigg)
Thank You for Your Servitude (Mark Leibovich)
The Age of Addiction (David Courtwright)
The Wager (David Grann) - Wonderful piece of historical nonfiction including maritime battles, imperial competition, indigenous badassery, a batshit crazy survival story, and unlimited scurvy. Amazing opening line: “The only impartial witness was the sun.”
Timefulness (Marcia Bjornerud) - “Rocks are verbs, not nouns.” Another wonderful line.
Tribe (Sebastian Junger)
Essays:
Lessons from the Anthropocene (John Green) - I give Lessons from the Anthropocene five stars. Delightful nonfiction essays which each end with an overall rating, e.g. “Canada Geese get two stars”. Green is a solid observer of the outrageous.
Self-Reliance (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
The Serviceberry (Robin Wall Kimmerer)
Fiction:
Playground (Richard Powers)
The Mountain in the Sea (Ray Nayler) - IMO much better than Playground.
Storm (George Stewart) - The very first eco-novel, which describes the story of a storm and its knock-on effects. My two favorite characters are the storm and the coyote.
Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow (Gabrielle Zevin) - A+, powerful read for me as a kid who grew up playing video games and has used them to escape physically painful times.